“No… SHE WASN’T READY!!”

You know when you turn a new age and everyone asks you “well, does it feel any different to be __?!” and honestly it feels exactly the same? 25 wasn’t like that at all. I’m sitting in my room listening to A Tribe Called Quest reflecting on when I was 15 and really discovered the trio for myself and not just hearing them from the backseat of my mom’s neon. A much simpler time, when life consisted of BFFs, crushes, and grades… where now… we fast forward to 25, three months away from 26 to be more precise and part of me always wants to panic and pull the fire alarm inside of my brain. I’ve probably seen 10 babies be born this year, countless professional upgrades, at least 5 people get the keys to new houses, and don’t even get me started on the amount of engagement announcements during this holiday season alone. Let’s be honest, that shit can be intimidating as fuck to scroll past. Should I be doing more? Should I be further along? Was calling off that relationship the right move? Is this even the right career path for me? All questions that ring around in a 20 something year old’s head while they inquest on their whole existence. Where do I go from here? I feel 2018 pulled the chair from under me and the stars aligned in the most magnificent way. Am I where I’m supposed to be right now? Absolutely. Despite how things might feel so uncertain or not apart of YOUR plan, you are exactly who you are supposed to be, placed exactly where you belong in this moment. I feel that if something in you, so strongly begs to differ on that, then that is energy to follow. Does that make sense? If you are that uncomfortable with your predicament, that is your cue to make change. It’s so easy to talk about being unhappy… but when will you actually go find happiness? This post is in shambles.

Let me steer things in a different direction, I hope you spent today being thoroughly happy. And if you did not, I’m stopping in this moment to pray for you. That you find the solace you need to get rest, the motivation you need to push forward, the insight you need to be fully aware, and the confidence that you need to make the next step.

This life is not easy, and spending the whole day scrolling threw others accomplishments does not make it any easier. As I so often say, take time out of your day to be present, focus on your own situations and accomplishments, give yourself the gratitude that you deserve. The first and biggest roll played in self-care, is self-love. I have to remind myself of that constantly. Being almost 26, my mind immediately focuses on 30. But why though? Why am I so hung up on not being ready to be 30, when it isn’t even here yet? When 25 just blew past my face in a disturbing blur and 26 is arriving and ready to be embraced for every second?

So, thats what I’m prepared to do. Enjoy my twenties however messy and confusing they might be, because at the end of the day they’re mine and I only get them once.

 

P.S. I hope you know how much your feedback and input means to me, you have a special place in my heart for reading. Thank you!

cheers & happy holidays.

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